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  • Writer's pictureGina Martin

Are you playing small?

Updated: Mar 9, 2022

3 reasons why we shy away from taking credit for our accomplishments and why it is essential to step into the spotlight!

You are a high-achiever, work for what you want kind of woman who takes pride in putting your best effort into everything you do and going above and beyond. However, sometimes you get feedback from team members, colleagues, or family members that you come across as intimidating, too eager, or always grabbing the spotlight.

But that's not the truth; the truth is that you are kind, considerate, and want to play fair and let others shine, but you have a hard time managing others' perceptions and figuring out how to share the spotlight!

Because of that, you tend to retract to a safe place, and you believe that if you could stay out of the spotlight or play small, you can still contribute but not be seen as inconsiderate.

Let me tell you a story about my experience with this…

A few months ago, a colleague of mine and I were selected to be contributors to a prestigious publication, which happened at around the same time. My friend announced to our circle of colleagues, and the news was well-received. We were all excited for her and cheered her on her accomplishments.

My immediate reaction, after being happy for her, of course! Was to retract "play small." I decided not to say anything to my group and not share it on social media.

Why did I do that?

Like many of us women, I didn't know how to be happy for her and at the same time be able to share the spotlight. It was easier to retract and hide than to overcome my fear of coming across as trying to steal her shine. But that doesn't serve me, as a matter that does not serve any of us.

Here are a couple of things I've learned through this experience that could help you too!

  • Surround yourself with the right network and friends, and you will never have to play small. A few days later, I reached out to my friend and shared with her that I was selected for the same opportunity. She was nothing but happy for me, and we could share some of our goals and fears as we were taking on this project. It all worked out for the best.

  • Getting feedback should not hold you back from trying again. It's so easy to feel defeated after hearing feedback from others; someone once told me, "feedback it's like spinach; you might not like it, but it's good for you." So instead, try listening to the feedback from an outsider's perspective. Use tools to help you identify your personality strengths and opportunities, such as assessments as your close circle of friends to give specific examples of when you might have had opportunities to improve. Best of all, keep at it.

  • Playing small keeps you from stepping into your greatness – it holds you back from sharing your gifts with others and fulfilling your purpose. By not stepping into the spotlight, you deprive others of the opportunity to learn from you and get inspired by you!

Remember, there's room at the top for all of us, and as women supporting and cheering on each other, we become stronger together and pave the way for others.

Part of the work I do with my clients is to help them become confident and feel empowered to step into the light and shine on!

Schedule a complimentary call with me today to learn more about what I do and what it would be like to work together and help you achieve your goals and dreams.

With love,


PS. I would love to hear from you.

What are your thoughts on this?

Can you relate?

Comment below!

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